Some leetle more updates, wogay?

Haan then. I don't have much else to offer in terms of updates – half formed ideas really, but I want to get them off my chest before I begin talking about Pune again.

The budget came and went, and I don't have an opinion on it.

Summer is here and it sucks. But the beer will taste better.

Raj Thackeray got us what we were truly lacking. Maharashtra is now right up there in the Crazy States stakes. Laggards for many a year while other states and leaders stole the limelight; we're now firmly back in the reckoning, and for a couple of proud days, we were actually the undisputed leaders. Many thanks, sir. Keep up the show, and we'll soon have the potential to aspire for global domination.

The mighty intellects that run the city of Bangalore have a new rule in place. You cannot dance – in discotheques. This is not news, but I found out about this recently. Personally, it makes no difference – Kulkarni cannot dance to save his life. But the proud flag bearers of lunacy in Bangalore implement this rule with missionary zeal. Bouncers in discos now keep an eye out – for people who dance.

As you can see, Raj sir, you have stiff competition. Once again, I urge you, don't rest on your laurels – the competition is already catching up.

Andhra Pradesh has recently announced waivers for marginalised everybody. Sharad Pawar, mightily displeased with young upstart Raj for his underhanded attempts at stealing the thorny crown, roared back into contention by asking for waivers for all kinds of farmers. The two hectare rule be damned – fish farming, horticulture, sericulture, floriculture – all should get waivers. Ganja addicts are ecstatic; growing weed at home may now enable you to get a loan waiver from the government.

India did not quite Chak De in Chile. Ric Charlesworth plays the role of the spurned lover with heart breaking sincerity, and a gent called Jyothikumaran mutters darkly about the dark days in hockey. KPS Gill, or Nero – call him what you will, stands proudly amidst the ruins and proclaims that all is well with Indian hockey. Pun permitting, may we suggest a pinch of reality?

And many other instances which go to show that we are as mad as we ever were. Which is good – nothing has changed while I was away, and the new world is as loony as the old. Bugs Bunny, poking his head out after a long nap, would have nodded approvingly.

And now, if you'll excuse me. We have important things to talk about, and Roopali beckons.

Pune eet ess, eet ees, eet ees!